#151 | How To Speak Confidently in Important Conversations

Speaking confidently is easy when you know what you’re going to say but how to speak confidently when you’re caught off guard, that takes some practice! Matt Abrahams, Stanford professor and LinkedIn Learning instructor has spent years teaching people to think faster and talk smarter and he shared some real gems with us during Coffee With Kim this week.

If you’re like me or fellow Coffee With Kim crew members you might find yourself getting nervous and all the words seem to start spilling from your mouth. I asked Matt how we can combat this and he said we need to make two shifts to our mindset:

1. Connection over protection. Be okay with not being perfect in these moments and stay present.
2. Opportunities not threats. When we’re caught off guard we can feel threatened try to rethink this.

Matt shared that most people struggle with focus when communicating. Communicating clearly and concisely makes it easier for others to remember what we’re saying. He illustrated this point with a quote “Tell the time, don’t build the clock.” The idea being tell enough but don’t go on and on. He left us with some great homework to use his framework: What, So what, now what, next time we communicate so that we stay focused and clear! I know I’ll be thinking back to this conversation next time I find myself having to speak on the spot. I hope it helps you just as much!

Want To Skip Around? Timestamps:

07:45 Two ways to shift your mindset to manage anxiety when speaking

10:30 Tips for slowing yourself down when speaking

12:36 How to respond when you don’t know the answer

16:42 How to avoid rumination when you make a mistake

19:19 Three common mistakes in communication

26:50 Ways to practice quick thinking and speaking

31:42 How to take out filler words

Links Mentioned:

Apps to help with filler words: https://sayitlikeso.com/, https://orai.com/, https://www.poised.com/

Practice with a virtual audience: https://virtualspeech.com/

Podcasts:

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast…,

https://www.gsb.stanford.edu/business…

Tools:

https://superhuman.com/

Newsletters:

https://www.danpink.com/subscribe/

Homework:

What, So what, Now what framework at https://mattabrahams.com/

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