#227 | Improve Your People Skills With Carolyn Goerner

You can have all the right tools, all the right answers, and still miss the moment if you don’t know how to connect. With AI showing up in more of our day-to-day work, it’s easy to wonder, where does the human part fit in now? In this conversation with Carolyn Goerner, who brings over 20 years of experience in psychology and leadership and teaches at the Kelley School of Business, we unpack why the human side of work is still the part that makes everything else actually work.

For Carolyn, emotional intelligence isn’t a buzzword, it’s a skill you practice in real time. She explains that the leaders who stand out aren’t just strategic, they’re aware. They’re paying attention to what’s being said and what’s not. They slow down, ask better questions, and focus on what’s really going on underneath someone’s behavior. That level of awareness is what builds trust and it’s something she’s seen make the biggest difference in both her teaching and her work with leaders.

She also shares practical ways to navigate the moments that tend to feel the hardest like difficult conversations and giving or receiving feedback. One of her go-to strategies is leading with curiosity instead of defensiveness. Something as simple as saying “tell me more” can shift the entire tone of a conversation. While tools like AI can help you prepare and think through different scenarios, Carolyn emphasizes that it’s how you show up in the moment that ultimately shapes the outcome.

Another theme Carolyn comes back to is the difference between boundaries and avoidance. She’s honest about the fact that not every uncomfortable moment is something to step away from, in many cases, those are the moments that build trust and create growth. She also highlights the importance of self-awareness, like recognizing your own negativity bias when receiving feedback, so you can respond more thoughtfully instead of reactively.

At the end of the day, AI can support you, but it can’t replace you. The real impact comes from how you connect, communicate, and show up for the people around you. Her advice is simple but powerful stay curious, be willing to lean into the uncomfortable moments, and don’t underestimate how far strong human connection can take you.

Timestamps:

06:03 The Intersection of AI and Human Experience

14:56 Navigating Difficult Conversations

19:02 Practicing Communication Skills

26:25 Leveraging AI for Emotional Intelligence Training

30:57 Navigating Feedback as a Perfectionist

35:24 Understanding Healthy Boundaries vs. Avoidance

40:15 Motivating Change and Overcoming Fear

45:41 Homework Assignment: Creating a Personalized Negotiation Coach

If You Enjoyed Today’s Episode:

1.) You should check out this episode, Tips For Building Your Relationship With AI

2.) Sign up for notes at copymyhomework.com for a full list of resources, links and recommendations listed on today’s episode.

3.) Post a screenshot of the episode & tag me on LinkedIn or Instagram @kimkaupe so we can talk about your favorite parts!

4.) Leave a positive review on any podcast platform (shameless, but someone’s gotta say it right?!)

5.) Subscribe for new episodes every Tuesday on your favorite podcast app.

Connect with Kim over on the socials!

Instagram + TikTok: @kimkaupe

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimkaupe/

Want To Learn More With Me?: Check out my LinkedIn learning courses here. 

Share: If you enjoyed this, please share with others by clicking on the social icons below…