There’s a certain point in the year when many of us start running on fumes. The goals that felt exciting in January suddenly feel heavy. The calendar is packed, the to-do list keeps growing, and despite checking all the boxes, something feels…off.

If you’ve ever found yourself wondering why success doesn’t feel as satisfying as you thought it would, you’re not alone. I sat down with Dr. Judith Joseph, a board-certified psychiatrist, researcher, and author who has spent years studying happiness, resilience, and something many people have never heard of: anhedonia. Her message was both eye-opening and reassuring: joy isn’t something you earn after working hard enough. It’s something you deserve and something your mind and body need to thrive.

When Achievement Starts Replacing Joy

One of the most fascinating parts of our conversation was Dr. Judith’s explanation of anhedonia, which is the inability to experience pleasure or joy from things that would normally make you happy. Unlike depression, which many people associate with sadness, anhedonia can be much harder to spot, especially in high achievers. You might still be productive. You might still be showing up for work, hitting goals, and managing responsibilities. But underneath it all, you feel disconnected. Maybe you struggle to relax, feel restless when you’re not working, or can’t remember the last time you felt genuinely excited about something. For many ambitious people, staying busy becomes a way to avoid uncomfortable feelings. The problem? The more we use achievement to distract ourselves, the further we drift from the experiences that actually bring us joy.

The Stories We Carry Matter

Dr. Judith shared that our relationship with joy is often shaped long before we realize it. Past experiences, childhood environments, cultural expectations, and even workplace dynamics can influence how comfortable we feel experiencing happiness. She describes this through what she calls a “biopsychosocial fingerprint” the unique combination of biological, psychological, and social factors that shape who we are. For some people, that fingerprint includes messages that their worth comes from achievement. For others, it includes unresolved pain, perfectionism, or environments where survival took priority over joy. One idea that really stayed with me was her reminder that we are all born with the capacity for joy. If you’re struggling to access it, that doesn’t mean something is wrong with you. It may simply mean there are experiences, beliefs, or environments that need your attention.

Building Resilience Through Small Moments of Joy

When most people think about resilience, they think about pushing through challenges. Dr. Judith offers a different perspective. Resilience isn’t just about enduring hard things; it’s about actively creating opportunities for joy, connection, and recovery. That might look like spending time with people who energize you, paying attention to moments that spark curiosity, or giving yourself permission to do something simply because it makes you happy. These moments may seem small, but they have a powerful impact on our emotional well-being. The science is clear: joy supports our physical health, strengthens our relationships, and helps us navigate challenges more effectively. In other words, prioritizing joy isn’t selfish. It’s one of the smartest investments you can make in yourself.

One of my favorite takeaways from this conversation was Dr. Judith’s belief that joy is a birthright, not a reward. So many of us have been conditioned to believe we have to earn rest, happiness, or fulfillment after we’ve accomplished enough. But what if joy isn’t waiting at the finish line? What if it’s available right now? If you’ve been feeling disconnected, exhausted, or stuck in achievement mode, consider this your reminder to pause and check in with yourself. Notice what energizes you. Pay attention to what brings you alive. And give yourself permission to pursue more of it. Because success feels a whole lot better when joy comes along for the ride.

Timestamps:

06:08 Understanding Anhedonia and Joy

16:03 The Impact of Technology on Emotional Health And The RESET Method

23:15 The Identity of High Achievers and Self-Worth

24:11 Understanding Self-Worth and Identity

27:40 Breaking the Cycle of Busyness

31:08 Setting Emotional Boundaries

38:49 Finding Your Unique Path to Joy

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