#226 | Stop Waiting, Start Doing: Closing the Courage Gap

The conversation you’re avoiding is probably the one that would change everything. You know the one. The email you keep rewriting but never send, the feedback you should give, the boundary you keep thinking, “ehhh maybe next time.” It’s uncomfortable, a little awkward, and way easier to avoid. But here’s the thing, those are usually the exact moments that move everything forward. It’s not just a nice idea, it’s something leadership expert and bestselling author Margie Warrell has spent years teaching, from advising Fortune 500 leaders to literally climbing Mount Kilimanjaro. If you’ve been feeling stuck lately, it’s probably not because you don’t know what to do… it’s because you’re hesitating to do it.

One of my favorite mindset shifts that Margie shares is this: stop asking “what should I do?” and start asking “who do I want to be in this moment?” Because those are two very different questions. If you were showing up as your most confident, honest, grounded self… what would you say? What would you do? It cuts through the overthinking fast. You’re not waiting to feel ready, you’re choosing how you show up, and then acting from there.

Margie then sits us down to talk about fear, it’s going to show up no matter how “confident” you are. Instead of trying to ignore it, get specific about it. Like, what are you actually afraid of? Looking stupid? Being judged? Making things awkward? Cool, name it. Because the second you do, it becomes way less intimidating. It goes from this big vague cloud to something you can actually look at and go, “okay… I can handle that.” The goal isn’t to get rid of fear, it’s to stop letting it run the whole show.

And please don’t think you need to go from zero to “life-changing confrontation” overnight. This is where Margie’s tip of small, safe risks come in. Think of it like reps at the gym, but for courage. Speak up once in a meeting. Say no to something you don’t actually have capacity for. Ask for feedback instead of overthinking it for three days. These are tiny moments, but they build real confidence. Not the fluffy kind, the kind that comes from proving to yourself, “oh, I can do hard things.”

And when it comes to those bigger, harder conversations? A little intention goes a long way. Get clear on what you actually want, lead with curiosity instead of going in hot, and remember, trust is built in the small moments way before the big ones. Also, quick reality check: most of the conversations you’re dreading? They’re never as bad as you think they’ll be. In fact, you’ll probably walk away wondering why you didn’t do it sooner. Because avoiding it doesn’t protect you… it just keeps you stuck. One honest moment can change a lot.

Timestamps:

06:02 The Importance of Courage in Conversations

12:44 Tactics for Brave Conversations

15:48 Practicing Safe Risks

18:43 Navigating Career Changes

20:35 Mapping Fears to Overcome Paralysis

25:15 Building Trust in Difficult Work Cultures

28:26 Being the Change You Wish to See

36:06 The Power of Saying No

Links:

https://margiewarrell.com/thecouragegap/

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